Life is a race where you’ll never catch up

When I was a student, I would have these moments of busyness that would overwhelm me. I would have 69 essays, 420 chores, and 3000 women to text back. Life was just busy but I always knew that I would be able to finish and just chill. HOWEVER, as an adult this is clearly not the truth. The hustle and bustle of work, trying to have some sort of a social life, maintaining relationships within your family, with the underlying threat of being poor and on the street and being alone for the rest of you life (last one was a little personal) – you’re just always busy. And you can’t even catch up on sleep because if you’re someone like me who wakes up between 6 am and 7:30 am everyday for work, your body won’t allow you to sleep past those times on the weekend. I think the reality is that you just won’t ever catch up.

Whenever a friend asks me how I am, I usually tell them that I’m well because that’s the truth – I am well. But I’m also just always a little busy with work and other real life things. It just never seems like I’ll have time to do everything that I want and I’m sure this is the same for you too. You know how hard it is to muster up a blog article everyday? Regardless, when I consider my busyness, it’s weird to not be reminded of my higher ups at work. People who are managers, who are in charge of other people at work, with larger responsibilities. Typically these folks are older and they also have a long term SO, a kid – maybe a few kids, a house, probably older parents to take care of. You see what I’m getting at? Things never really slow down – they just get busier.

And it’s not just life or sleep you won’t catch up on. It’s impossible to catch up with your friends who you haven’t seen in awhile because let’s be honest here, they’re just trying to catch up too. You know you’re an adult when you have to make an Excel to plan hanging out with your friends. My rule for reaching out to friends who I haven’t seen in TIME is that I will reach out once or twice, if both times they can’t hangout on proposed dates or can’t provide an alternative – it’s over. I am no longer interested in hanging out until I get that itch again. Maybe we could make something work this time next year, when we’re still not caught up. Nothing personal kid.

You may also find yourself trying to catch up to your peers. “Well Jimothy is making $420k a year, is married, has 8 kids, lives in a mansion, travelled the world – and he’s only 16, what gives?” You’ll never be Jimbo. But he’ll never be you. You think Lebron James, the Chinese bootlicker will ever be able to sit for hours at a time and look at an Excel sheet like me? Nope. Do you think Elon Musk would ever be able to have a normal relationship? Nope. We don’t need to chase goals set by other people because those goals are not about you and it’s your insecurity speaking in your mind, trying to make things about you. Don’t even bother catching up, run your own race.

All this being said, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing to struggle catching up. Sometimes you’re just overwhelmed with fun things. Going on vacation, making big exciting plans like a wedding, buying a home – these parts of your life will be exhausting but you know that you’re building towards something that you’re going to enjoy and want. When you’re looking to make positive changes in your life, you’re going to get busiser. It’s a race you’re looking forward to running. That’s being busy by choice. It’s when work is ramping up without much benefit to you, when something happens in the family, or when you yourself is going through a crisis – that’s when the catching up feels like a marathon that you’re just slogging through.

But no matter what pace these things happen, you just have to take it day by day and understand that this is life and that these things will happen inevitably. The work will be done eventually (and it’s just work), people come and go, and things that are meant to be are meant to be. You’re going to spend your whole life trying to catch up, you might as well not freak the heck out because of it. Also I haven’t kept up with any anime or manga for like 2 months and I’m very afraid of all the time I’m going to have to sink if I try to catch up.

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