I Am Balding . . . But That’s OK

Back in April 2020, I realized that under the light of my student house bathroom, my scalp was looking a little more visible. I didn’t think too much of it. I came out the shower, maybe the lighting was just something that I had never noticed before and I carried on. As the months go by – I start noticing that more hair was going into the shower drain. I noticed that whenever I would put product into my hair, more strands were wrapped between my fingers. I started to worry a little more at this point and was wondering if I was actually losing hair. But then when I finally moved back into my parent’s house and lived with my brother, who would often tease me, he let me know everyday that I was balding. The reality of the situation was that my hair – the thing that I had loved my entire life and took so much care of, was finally leaving my head. At the time I was 24 years old when I noticed this and I was mortified. I didn’t realize that hair loss could happen at such a young age, so I tried my best to correct this.

I ended up doing all the research I could. I watched all the YouTube videos, joined all the subreddits and found that the chances of me regaining a real hairline without surgery and spending a lot of money was nearly impossible. I accepted my fate and realized that I had two paths. I could either preserve what I had with drugs or I could just just shave it all of. I took the former. I started taking finasteride everyday and it helped. I would even say that my hairline is better now than it was this time two years ago when I first started. I felt OK about my hairline but still . . . whenever I took a picture, even with a nice smile or outfit – I would just stare at the parts of my hairline that weren’t great. I’m still bitter about it but I do feel better about it now than I have in the past. Isn’t it silly? To be a grown adult and worry about how you look?

To my brothers out there who have been balding and are holding on for dear life, I just wanted to say that your masculinity and your exuberance relative to your age, has nothing to do with your hairline. It’s like your height or your bone structure, it’s a part of you that you can’t change and it means nothing for your character. Just like how your memory might fade, your ability to recover after a night of drinking might delay, and your pension for fun might slow – this is just another part of life that happens because it’s normal. It’s your body reading a script that wasn’t written by you. And if anybody tries to make you feel bad about it, they’re the ugly ones. They’re the ones who don’t get it. Sure, I got lucky and stopped it before it could really happen but I’m also resigning myself to a life where I will be taking prescription drugs until I decide to let it go.

It’s important to talk about these things as I find that the more I spoke about this with other men, the more that I also learned that they were afraid. Guys who have been confident, good looking, and easy going – no matter what, they just always seems to be afraid of this impending doom. Most men will regress in their hairline, that’ just how the world works. But just because that’s how the world is it doesn’t mean that you have to go it alone. Talk to your mates if you feel sad about it, connect with them on this relatable issue. Learn about how much it matters for you to keep your hairline, if it’s worth it and make a plan regarding your hair. At the end of the day, it’s on you whether you want to keep it or not. I just wanted to write this for Movember because I wanted my fellow men to feel a little better and to shine a light on a topic that I feel that many men are quiet in darkness about. It takes more than the head on your hair that makes you a man.

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